So it's been a year to the day that mother nature saw fit to send her bitchy daughter Irene to drown my home -for no good reason whatsoever. I did used to date her, but frankly speaking; bitch be crazy. So I was very careful when we parted ways, and it was so long ago that I thought I was safe. Some dishes are said to be best served cold. And believe me, it was.
I guess it goes to show you, you've not only got to be careful how you break up, but also who you break up with! Now I feel like I should've done it with a shovel and tarp rather than flowers and a break-up dinner at the Olive Garden. (No, not the crappy restaurant. The very first olive grove, in Galilee. duh)
But when life hands me lemons, I make a lemon orchard, and then I make a drought at neighboring orchards so as to drive up the price of my produce. (Who settles for making lemonade? Really? What are you, a mortal?) Well, each to his ability.
In any event, as you can tell from the un-retouched photo above I've really done wonders with the place. Or will, when I'm completely done. (I fantasize in 14-meg HD full color images. Don't you?) And why not? Even gods get to dream. Especially wanna-be's. <sigh>
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| Isn't my rebuilt home beautiful? Ok, I'm not actually at this stage of reconstruction yet... but you can see I've got plans! There's also going to be a helipad and a bunnycave 'round the back. |
So it's been a year to the day that mother nature saw fit to send her bitchy daughter Irene to drown my home -for no good reason whatsoever. I did used to date her, but frankly speaking; bitch be crazy. So I was very careful when we parted ways, and it was so long ago that I thought I was safe. Some dishes are said to be best served cold. And believe me, it was.
I guess it goes to show you, you've not only got to be careful how you break up, but also who you break up with! Now I feel like I should've done it with a shovel and tarp rather than flowers and a break-up dinner at the Olive Garden. (No, not the crappy restaurant. The very first olive grove, in Galilee. duh)
But when life hands me lemons, I make a lemon orchard, and then I make a drought at neighboring orchards so as to drive up the price of my produce. (Who settles for making lemonade? Really? What are you, a mortal?) Well, each to his ability.
In any event, as you can tell from the un-retouched photo above I've really done wonders with the place. Or will, when I'm completely done. (I fantasize in 14-meg HD full color images. Don't you?) And why not? Even gods get to dream. Especially wanna-be's. <sigh>
I especially like how you added the mountain range in the backyard. Nice touch. Probably helps to keep the neighbor's dogs out.
ReplyDeleteLOL@ What are you, a mortal?
ReplyDeleteSully,
ReplyDeleteand that's more important than you know, I HATE my neighbor's dog! He's almost as big a jerk as my neighbor.
Angie,
nice to know somebody shares my twisted sense of humor. Now get thee to a therapist, woman! (Mine's excellent)
How in he holy hell is your wife supposed to keep that joint clean. And, I hate to say it, but "what" are you over compensating for with the size? I'm just saying.
ReplyDeleteI think I went to your place in Vegas... a very enjoyable visit, you're a gracious Host. Your Blog is hilarious and I needed a good laugh today.
ReplyDeleteDawn... The Arizona Desert Bohemian