This is why I dumped Mother Nature in the first place

Yeah, we went out.  She was just 'Maiden' Nature back then and quite fetching especially in her Spring outfit.  And half the time she was so warm it was all I could do to just sit there and bask in her glow.  Those were the  good times, and there were a lot of them. 

But she always had an indifferent streak, mood swings (she could go from very hot to ice cold in like six months, and then switch back like it was nothing) and a foul temper that could rise in an instant.  I thought she was bad as a teen, especially when she had that outbreak of volcanoes.  I tried to tell her "everybody gets pimples at this age, just leave them.  You can rinse with rain."  But no, she had to pop them.  Goodbye, Pompeii.

I tried to have an intellectual discussion with her on restraint and the amorality of random smiting, but she'd just laugh and flash her eyes "Do tell, floodboy!"  [There was a reason for that, which I've detailed earlier.  But that's another story.]  Her indifference eventually turned me off. 

It was a problem.  She never blamed anything on herself and it was more annoying than I was willing to tolerate.  I had to sit her down "It's not me, baby, it's you."  She cried thunderstorms (gotta expect it, right?) and that was it for us.  She had calmed down since then and been mostly pleasant (for her) until recently.

Judging by the hot flashes she's having (regular enough to warm the globe) and the ever more frequent bouts of temper, I'd say my erstwhile girlfriend is entering a rough menopause.  Be warned people; it will be a while.

I wish you all the best.  As for Myself, I think I'll chill on Venus for a while; very sultry orbit, no plate tectonics (this is true) and frankly she's been sending a lot of very clear signals My way lately.

As always, If I Were God appreciates comments, ad-clicks and sharing of His articles.  He sees all; disappoint Him not.