Wednesday, December 7, 2011

"Let there be walls!" and lo, there were walls.

Yes, I know it's a very dark picture.  I said 'let there be walls', not 'let there be light'.  I shoulda said both.
So now there's walls. 
Walls, walls everywhere's a wall.
Here, there and in the hall
unpainted still, but very tall
screwed in tight so they don't fall
can't you hear me y'all?
listen up and hear my calls
I'm up to my balls in walls

(and it feels good)

Not only have my drywall guys finished their job, but nobody's lost any body parts for over a week!
Now the baseboard heating can go in and be hooked up to the new furnace that's been waiting for days.
And then Lo!  There will be heat.  But there will be no post titled "Let there be heat".  Let's be honest; these posts aren't very funny, and this blog hasn't been much fun since Irene gave us a bath.  (Flood joke, still not funny)

So it's time to resurrect the funny.  I while ago I promised pages from a book I finished last summer, mostly so I could just throw those up here quickly and get back to wiring/tiling/plastering/painting.  I immediately ran into problems transferring the layout from its PDF format to Blogger.  I could get the prose in easily enough, but the color-coded text boxes (packed to their little lids with humor, I promise) would not translate.  I tried using my new Mac to take pictures of entire pages, which it did, but they would not digitally transfer over here.  Nothing's been easy lately, my friends.

With my main focus on making my house livable by Halloween Thanksgiving Christmas, I didn't spend a whole lot on time on the solution (selfish, I know.  No non-deity is perfect)  But recently my brother Robinhood, who is every bit as sharp a techie as a marksman, was able to load a *discounted* version of Photoshop onto my new Mac, and using that I can now convert the pages with their text boxes into jpegs which Blogger takes to like Jerry Sandusky takes to little b-, oh never mind.  Anyway...

Tomorrow: the first installment and (probably not too) eagerly awaited world premier of  (drumroll please...)
What if God is Cheating on Us?


  1. I'm really excited about the walls! They look perfect! Having walls is something to really be grateful for when you think about it.

    I look forward to see what shows up tomorrow. I've missed you, Dude (I mean god).

  2. Keep on keepin' on, my friend. Looking forward to the funny business.

  3. A *discounted* version of Photoshop? Isn't that going against one of the Commandments, God? Thou shalt not download thy neighbour's software...

  4. Nice paean to The Five Man Electrical Band!

    Looking forward to the excerpts. I'm sure they'll be great.

    By the by, did that finger get reattached?

  5. Linda,
    the place is so much brighter now, it almost looks habitable.

    thanks, I'll try not to disappoint

    Nicky Mags,
    You're forgetting the most important one: Thou shalt not whistle-blow on ME

    Nope. Had the bone shaved and skin wrapped around it. He's got some kind of plastic cap on it now to extend it to thumb size.

  6. I am so excited to see some of the pages! I'll wait patiently and admire your walls in the mean time. So up to your balls in walls would be like balls deep right? I am going to try to use that phrase a lot this week. You are balls deep in walls.

  7. From the look of the photo.... you are real close! After such a nightmare that I cant even imagine it looks like you are nearing livability again. Good for you guys. Cheers!

  8. Ange,
    That makes it sound like my new living room is lined with glory holes! IT IS NOT.

    that's, I just got approval to borrow some vacation days from next year so I can try to finish by Christmas week and my 2yr old can have a tree in her house.